Sunday, December 24, 2006

This time of the year. This moment that everyone is celebrating Christmas, I don't know why but I choose to stay at home. I turned down my friends who are going to have a celebration tonight. Reading a book which my friend gave me for present. I find it hard to continue reading without having a emotional turmoil. I want to take this chance to tell my church friends I got your presents ready. I will give you all on Friday cause I got duty today and can't meet you all to give you guys.

I also don't know why I suddenly loss the interest in going out and celebrate. I just want to have a close friend beside me and not the whole world. Reading the book about friendship makes me hard to digest the details inside. In addition to the letter he gave, I felt like crying even more. My friend, you are never forgotten. What I promise I will keep. I am so emotional right now and I really hope I can talk to someone. Even at this moment when I am typing this, I feel like crying too. There is just so many things happening in this year that I am total lost in the transaction.

I suddenly feel that I have many things yet to complete and time is running short. I miss the carefree life and the unlimited time I used to enjoy. I only pray that this day will end quickly and await the next day to come.

Anyone going out tomorrow on Christmas day? Invite me out. I need friends to cheer me up. I am over the emo-meter. I need comfort. Reading the book and the letter makes it even worse but I am just so 'fan jian' that I just read it again and again. Who can help me now? God I need you! Send me some friends to keep me company! I will gather my courage and ask him. God I need you so...