Sunday, October 21, 2007

The stress level is building up and I am nearly burnt out. It is just taking so much out of me and kept me having wild thoughts. As the days draw nearer, I am feeling more and more nervous. I wonder if I can pull through this ordeal.

One last week to the final judgement. It just seem so fast and the next thing we know, we will be getting back our results. But before that, it is a series of worries and stressfulness.

I feel so unprepared, as if I have not done anything for this A levels at all. There are still so many things that I don't know and have no confidence in. I dare not predict or spot any questions in advance because if they don't come out, I am dead. So I am trying to do my best to absorb every single thing that is being learnt in the process and try to recall everything that have been taught to me over this course of education.

This strange feeling lingers in me which caused me to be distracted. I can't pinpoint the exact feeling or what causes it to be there. It could be a person, a belief, a desire or an emotion. I can't make head or tail out of it. What I can certain is that it is disturbing me.

How I wish this moment can remain as it is, without the dawning of day. Then the next day will never come and we need not worry about the future. What a wonderful idea this is.

To someone:
Sometimes I just hope that I have the courage to do things I want. But I can face the truth once the disillusion is over. Guess that our friendship is too fragile. But I have somehow know the answer is not to my liking. Maybe I should be determine to ask the question and let this friendship ends before anyone sinks too deep. Given a chance, I will never hope for this to happen. But if it is our destiny, so be it. I don't want this to hinder me now.