Sunday, December 18, 2005

Let me start by asking a question. Who in this world have never feel lost before? Even the strongest Christian will also have a time that they feel lost. Me? I am not a strong Christian and therefore I feel lost all the time. I know that I should seek God and with God we are whole and shouldn’t feel lost but all these is easier said than done. Anyway, let us get to the point.
Lost is when you feel that you do not know what to do, where to go or even how to do. Do you ever had the feeling that after lesson or after something important, you do not know what to do? Or where to go? Or even who to go with? That feeling is lost. After lunch the whole group of friends sits there wondering what to do next. When you are in the middle of two groups of friends and both group want to do different things and the group that you want to go out with never ask you along but the other group that you don’t really want to go out with ask you out. All these don’t know what to do are actually signs of lost. What is actually feeling lost? How does it appear? Why does it appear?
Feeling lost is when you actually have something in your mind that you want to do but never seems to be able to do it and even when you have nothing in mind of what to do at all. To put it simple, you do not have a visible objective. A good example of such is like holiday is coming to an end and you know it well but you don’t know what to do to make full use of the remaining time. Lost happens when you have no idea of what to do. It appears when you do not plan the day before-hand and let things go one step at a time. But when time comes we usually don’t know what to do. It occurs when one have no one close to. There is no usual group to hang out with. But it is not only so but that even with a usual group, there will also be times that you will feel lost.
How can anyone escape the torment of feeling lost? By being cold? By isolating oneself?
Or simply by planning your days weeks before? I prefer isolating myself and not knowing about everything. Not knowing means no worries. Today while I was sleeping at luke’s house I was not aware of what is happening and I was enjoying myself. I don’t want to bother about any thing already. People’s problem is not my concern. I live my life the way I want. I don’t want to care about any other things. I am giving myself a break and get back the relation I once used to have with God. I don’t need man and I don’t need any close friends. Everyone will just be a normal friend to me. I will also go out less with my friends. Neither friends nor foe last….